Not a spark;a flame that doesn't burn out!!

Saturday, August 29, 2015

My soul, an artist.

I have always been someone who has loved and admired the vivid world of stories, poetry, dance, music to the core. When I look back to the childhood days of mine I remember obsessing over the world of fantasies through storybooks my mom frequently brought us. I loved reading; it took me into a magical world of Simba, Alice, Neverland, the pirates and Aladdin. My favorite was “The Arabian nights” collection. Books had a certain power in them that made a curious enthusiast child in me blend so well within the fantasy world of the characters. As an avid reader, I wrote…I wrote a lot of poems and stories in my spare times…every time I wrote anything, I would show it to my grandfather who always encouraged me to write better. He himself being a wonderful poet with hundreds of poems in his own poetry collection often said that it could be the genes effect from my forefathers who were into playwrights and stuffs for me to develop such interest. How cool is that? I was also very much into dancing…and my family would nag a lot about for me to stop dancing everywhere in the house…hilarious memories! My parents, especially my father being great singers; I too nurtured a singer inside me to pull off the “gene effect”.  I also had/have this unusual capability of memorizing movie dialogues by heart and loved performing scenes aloud. We were never allowed to play outdoors I guess that’s why I turned out to be more creative than being adventurous. Oh well.

I grew up as an art lover, one who finds herself truly obliged to be a part of such a magnificent world full of art. I discovered about myself that music, writing, movies, dance, and reading…these things complete my identity. They are more like falling in love, with the same feels and thrills…except for the good deal of fact that they have no heartbreaks to retain (unless your favorite character dies in a fiction or Game of thrones). I still get the feel of euphoria from the very first moment of reading a book that was some Peter rabbit book by Beatrix Potter…the first time of stepping onto a stage…or the time I saw Elvis Presley shake a leg in “Jailhouse rock” and almost fell in love with him twice…and the first time I watched the movie Casablanca only to get hooked with classics... I sometimes wish I were in the old times; those renaissance periods, of course. And I know that in my past life I must have belonged to that romantic era of fine artistry. The zeal inside me reveals so much. I will forever be envious of Shakespeare’s brilliance and Jane Austen’s way of presenting romance. I will forever lose myself in the music of jazz and sing together with the rock gods. I am a captive of this artistic world realizing never to be set free but, more than happy to be a part of because they define my inner soul and I feel I was born to be this. I know that I would not be content being a happy wife to a well off man, spending rest of her life in the boundaries of her kitchen and home, making her man, taking care of business. I mean, I respect all of that but its not who I am. I would rather want to travel until my heart aches for home again, with someone I love…or if not…without him. To the roads unknown…to get lost in a faraway world…speaking different accents…humming different tunes…dancing to new beats…tasting different hands…I know I have a hipster heart but home would definitely be the last station I would want to reach…waking up everyday to the tune of a piano…ending the nights with the music of a beautiful melody. That's what a good life looks like to me.

From few personal surveys on myself, I have realized a strange co incidence that I have only been attracted to people who are artistic in nature. Even if it’s a little, I have liked those and connected to those who are into artistic pursuits... Musicians, movie geeks, artists et cetera et cetera. And I find a bond within them, a closeness already and a sense of attachment. It is easier to be in their company…similar vibes makes it agreeable. So if in future if I ever have a heart for anyone as such, I wouldn’t be surprised. I believe world is merely an art. We are the products of such fantastic art of the gods or the universe. Life without music, literature would not be worth living. These make a difference in the everyday chaotic lives of us, people, and will continue making for the rest of our lives. They say artists do not have much in their pockets. Yes…kind of true! But an artistic soul has more than everything that other people fail to receive from the world because they see beauty in everything; they make a great deal out of the pettiest things in life. They know how to live life really and are these splendid creatures in the world full of hypocrisy and materialism. I hope an artist is born everyday and she gives this world a renewed perspective to live with.
Be it the ‘genes effect’ or ‘past life effect’ as I like to call it but I am thankful to god for wiring me this way and also to those who have created inspirations and muses throughout the time for us to aspire for everyday. With such richness they survive…they make the world around them seem so surreal and illusionary that we start questioning everything. I hope someday, I could be a part of this brilliance of human mind in the world where slowly the real beauty is being forgotten with the evolvement of time. I feel I am partly involved already with my passionate love for writing, music, dance and everything. Still it feels I have many more blank spaces to fill. And I hope I find ways of filling them up as I grow old. Oh, I am sorry artsy people never grow old…they remain young forever…young in their hearts.

Saturday, August 1, 2015

To my best friend

Dear Sneha,
Firstly, don’t freak out that you have to read! I know you do not like reading long paragraphs but I have tried to keep my emotions short and sweet, which was a tough thing to do. You must have already scrolled down to see how long the paragraphs are, now haven’t you?
I don’t think there is anything I haven’t said to you (because there’s not a single day we go without talking) but some things are meant to be written. So my love, read carefully*DON’T SKIP ANY SENTENCE! And I know you will because this one’s for you!
I remember the first time I saw you, some six years ago, after I switched school. It was my very first day; you were there, smiling that beautiful smile as always…I felt a connection with you immediately. The feelings were of comfort, friendliness, companionship and warmth. You know I am the kind of person who has hard time trusting people. It takes a while for me to open up to anyone but with you, with you it was a mutual feeling of trust and understanding. I knew I could count on you and you wouldn’t let me down ever, guess what? I was absolutely right. 
We are so different yet so similar. We both carry these contrasting personalities, which conflicts with each other at times but still have so much in common. Talking of which, our common love for food, common future plans, and most importantly the love we share. We are not the regular best friends, are we? We totally rely on each other. You have seen me through almost every situation; remember me going crazy for my first crush? To the time, I decided to let go. You have closely felt my emotions, seen me with my anger face, seen me crying my eyes out and heard my loudest laughter (So have I). You also have seen me fall in love, seen me through my gloomy days, and seen me in heartbreaks and pain…overall you have grown up with me. From my weaker worst till my stronger best, you have lived in all. To the world, I may or may not be that “perfect person” but only you know my flaws, my fears are and the not so beautiful sides of me. 
What do I say about you? I love you for being the crazy and weird you and never changing yourself for anyone. I just love you for having a beautiful child-like heart with so much love in it and it makes me love you even more because you are unaware of that …I love you for always being that amazing daughter you are to your family and also a sister who puts her sibling’s happiness before hers. I love you for how you over think even in petty matters, I love you for taking the bigger pizza slice EVERY time… I love you for turning too sensitive at times and of course your unpredictability… I love you for how realistic you are and I love you for how you just smile and brighten up everyone’s life. I also love you for sleeping during the class and leaving me not knowing what to do. (Yeah thanks!)  You have grown so much responsible in these years and I am proud of it I really have learned so much from you. Did I ever mention to you that you give me confidence? Yes you do. When I am with you I feel nothing in the world is Impossible, the way you support me and handle my recklessness, someone else would have definitely freaked out. I honestly don’t know how life would be without your presence, it would be scary and also dull. You have been my best friend my family my sister and sometimes my boyfriend too. Ask me why I am single…I blame you.
Thanks for always sticking by me, in rough times as well as being a part of great unforgettable memories. Thanks for never getting bored of my jokes, thanks for telling me when I look horrible, thanks for making me realize that I am full of imperfections and that’s okay. Thanks for finally agreeing that led zeppelin rocks and metal songs are awesome. (TEE HEE) Thanks for never judging when I put on weight, thanks for being a part of the madness in my life. Thanks for making my life a better place. Most significantly, thanks for letting me know what friendship really is about. Thanks for being my best friend. 
Even though, we plan to do every big things in our life together; from our career goals to the big wedding we both want to the time we have wrinkles. Just imagine us after turning into old grandmas, I know we would still be judging people, ranting about our grandchildren and laughing at the silliest things and of course FOOD how can I forget FOOD. However, if we ever walk different paths in life, I promise to never let our friendship fade away and I promise to support you in all your decisions as I have been doing before. Our friendship will remain unchanged and deep down I know that, I know you too. After all, we have come a long way together and I still can anticipate the further roads we shall walk on... If I have hurt you or let you down ever, I want to take a moment to say sorry but one of my biggest fears would be losing you. Because, you probably have way too much information about me and I can’t afford to risk my personal information. I want to see you until the time I leave for my grave. 

Happy friendship day love. I thank god for giving me a lifetime friend I once wished for. And I am sorry if it wasn't as short as you expected...but totally worth the read. Am I right or am I right?

And take a look at the video too. That's all.